(Los Angeles) Officials report that one woman recently reported on at least three occasions, strong feelings of wanting to run away from two friendly men with possible serial killer tendencies.
The report noted that these encounters occurred on a train, with one man a fellow commuter the woman sees frequently.
“This is not the first time I’ve seen [the first man],” the woman shared. “I take the train to and from work, and I see him sometimes when I have to look for a seat on the upper level.”
“But I want to run away every time I see [the first man].”
Close friends, who were with the woman during two recent encounters, confirmed the woman’s strong reaction.
“Her face looked like she saw a ghost,” laughed one friend, not realizing the danger they were all in. “She was definitely uncomfortable and weird.”
When prompted for an example, she shared: “Well, she kept laughing at odd moments during our conversation, and messaging us emojis of discomfort face… like, literally while he was sitting across the aisle from us.”
When asked why the woman wanted to run away, the report notes that the woman initially responded with a strangled cry and put her hands over her face. It goes on to cite that his favorite reading material is a gun aficionado magazine and his haircut makes him look like a serviceman. But most pointedly, the report mentions several times that he attempts to look at her and catch her eye to smile.
The report notes that nothing happens beyond smiling when they do make unfortunate eye contact.
The woman met the second potential serial killer while also riding the train. Taking an early train home, the report notes a near-empty car when a man, this time dressed in full military uniform, starts chatting with the woman about upcoming train stops before moving onto topics of profession, schooling, and personal interests.
The report describes the man as of Indian descent with a London accent, friendly demeanor and a weird nail injury. He’s also self-described as friendless, learning German, and is an aspiring cardiologist.
“It felt really easy to have a conversation with him,” the woman confided, “but I declined when he asked me to go see a movie with him because he just wants a ‘mate.'”
“I took that to mean in the British vernacular.”
The report goes on to note that as the station neared and they both detrained, they shook hands after he wiped his nose with his hand. He then mentioned the need to call a ride-sharing service.
“I felt so guilty that I declined on the movie, I thought about offering to drive him somewhere,” confessed the woman. “But then I remembered that I’m not supposed to offer rides to strangers – yes, I recently needed to be reminded – and so I didn’t say anything.”
“So I didn’t offer a ride to a stranger although he was serving our country, was kinda cute with an accent, and was lonely.”
“So, yeah… He could’ve been a serial killer.”
The report concludes that there was no evidence that these men may have been serial killers. They were, what the report authors dryly note, “two friendly guys.”
“But, maybe not,” countered the woman. “I almost died, you know…”
Tastes Like Onion 
